I Still Remember...

I remember like it was yesterday... the memories SO VIVID in my mind... September 11, 2001... the PERFECT day... the temp was mild... the sky SO BLUE and clear... I was just walking out the door to meet my husband for a much anticipated Drs. appointment... We were anxious to find out if we had finally been successful and were going to welcome another member into our family... I had my keys in hand and was heading toward the door to leave... and the phone rang... I glanced at my watch and decided to answer it (I had almost 45 minutes before my appointment time)... it was my sister... "Hello" I said... "Lala" turn on the TV... turn on the TV" my sister literally screamed into the phone... "Ok... what's going on" I ask heading for the nearest television... by this time my sister was crying "Turn on your television... turn it on... OMG"... just as I turn on the television... the second plane hit and I hear a startled cry on the other end of the phone... "Oh My God... WHAT is happening?" my sister sobbed... I couldn't answer her... I just stood with the phone to my ear... transfixed on the image on the telelvision... not really believing WHAT I had just seen... was it REAL? I remember getting the chills... my WHOLE body tingled... a huge lump in my throat... and intense sadness came over me... I stood staring at the television... not really HEARING what the reports were saying... just STARING... quiet... just intense quiet followed... finally I whispered "WHAT has just happened... WHAT has just happened?"... my sister and I spent the next half hour together on the phone... staring at the televisions we were watching... I could hear my sister crying... and know we just kept whispering "Oh my God"... not really to each other... just because we didn't know what else to say... more horror and sadness would happen within the next hour... but my sister and I would not be connected through the phoneline... I had hung up with her promising to call after my appt.

My husband was not able to make the appointment as planned... he was working in a Federal Building and had been put on alert for recall that morning... when I arrived at the Drs. he had left me a message that he was SAFE and would talk to me later... the receptionist made it a point to tell me that my husband had wanted me to know he loved me very much... She hesitantly handed me a slip of paper... I looked down at it... she had written the date/time and my husband's message WORD for WORD... knowing where he worked and what he did I THINK she thought it was important that I get the message exactly as my husband had given it to her (I still have that slip of paper)...

The waiting room at the Drs. was QUIET... people kept leaving and going out to their cars to listen to the radio... and would come back in and tell everyone what was going on... Another plane went down in PA... the Pentagon has been hit... I sat quietly clutching the message from my husband wondering HOW this could be happening...

We got the news that we had been desperately waiting for... we were in fact going to welcome another member into our family... something we had been waiting many years for... on that day... a day so filled with SADNESS and Horror... I felt a HAPPINESS that could not be described

I remember that day... September 11, 2001... like it was yesterday... and the days that followed... the news reports... the images... the stories... the feelings I felt...

Today it is raining... a gentle rain coming from a gray sky... it is QUIET... in the house... and neighborhood... I have dug out that message from my husband that the receptionist gave me... as I have every year on this day and read it... my husband has called and we have talked about THAT day... the day that not only OUR WORLD changed... but the WHOLE WORLD changed...

I still remember... and will never forget...